Some things heard recently in the Blough house...

The flu hit us early this year...and hit us all.  This gave us a LOT of time to spend stuck in the house together, not that it's a bad thing...but it does tend to make one a bit slap-happy...

Here are a few memorable quotes from our time in quarantine...

After watching the movie Thomas & the Magic Railroad I was channel chasing and came across The Hunt for Red October.  After about 5 minutes of watching Sean Connery running around the sub Caedon turned to me and said, "The Submarine Conductor lost his sparkle didn't he Dad..."  He sure did Caedon...good observation...now let's see what's on Noggin?!?

"You don't look good honey" I said, "you don't have any color this morning."  Brody's response: "Well candy is has a lot of color...can I have some candy?"

"Let's have quiet time guys, daddy's head is really pounding"  The boys response: "Ok Dad...but can we play our drums for quiet time because we already watched a show today."  Sure boys...why not....

"Stop running your truck into your other toys!  If you don't have any respect for your stuff, maybe I should give your toys to some other kids who need them?!"  Response, very graciously:  "Well...you can give them these ones, they're broke."

"Brody, how do you feel this morning buddy?"  "I is still feeling sick....but not if we going to Grandma's...just if we going to school."

"Caedon, does your throat hurt?"  "No Dad...only when I cough...or talk..."

And my favorite...after being up all night with a feverish, kicking and coughing Brody beside me in bed...I asked him, "Did you sleep good last night?"...already knowing that he hadn't.  His response was:

"I think I did..but I don't know why you keep waking me up?  That is mean to wake me up Daddy..."  

Sorry Brody...my body was in the way of your feet, knees and an occasional elbow...how thoughtless of Daddy...

The Boy and the Universe

When once a boy stood at the edge of a field

The Universe stopped for a moment and said

Pardon me son, have you thoughts now to run, to play and skip and to race

Not me, said the boy, for I cannot see past the hand right in front of my face

My eyes are not right and the sun is too bright, I would stumble should I try to race

The Universe paused, filled with sadness and said,  come, lift your hands to the sky

And with that the boy did as the Universe said and the winds began to fly

The boy lifted off as the sky breathed in and the air swirled around the boy’s feet

He rose above the field, the trees and the land

He rose above homes and lemonade stands

He rose above oceans and into the clouds where he felt the cool dew on his brow

He opened his eyes and a smile grew wide as he understood his new friend's intent

He saw the kind eyes of the Universe and the Universe looked down at the boy

Both locked in a gaze that lasted for days and filled both their hearts with great joy

The Universe explained, with sadness and pain, that he understood the boy’s lament

For the clouds fogged his sight as they swirled around the world and he could not easily see

The boy understood, said he was sorry and promised to watch for clear skies

And the Universe was happy and put the boy safely back down in the field, satisfied

And when clear skies came the boy ran to the field and squinted his eyes to the sky

And he waved hello from the field below, looking into the Universe's eyes

The Universe looked down and smiled at the boy and warmed his face with the sun

And the boy lived his life always feeling quite proud that he and the Universe were one

October 15th is International Credit Union Day!

I know it is not a holiday that is on many calendars. It hasn’t made it to the “Hallmark Holiday” status. Nobody (aside from those of us in the industry) will be throwing a party for it or sending a card. But that doesn’t mean that International Credit Union Day is a day that should go unnoticed.

At the Wayne County Community Federal Credit Union we serve anyone who lives, works, worships or attends school within Wayne County, Ohio. Some might see that as limiting. We see it as an advantage. We only focus on what matters to the people of Wayne County. We strengthen the people and communities in Wayne County and fill the specific needs of Wayne County…and we are great at it.


We have around 4500 members, just under $34million in assets and we spend 100% our time and our resources putting as much value as possible back into the lives of those members, and in the community we share.


I will be celebrating the day by going to Waynedale High School and teaching 3 separate senior high classes the ins and outs of credit, but this isn’t just a one day thing for us. Two out of every three credit unions in Ohio provide some form of free financial education to their communities. That’s more than 350 credit unions and communities that are strengthened because we know that the best financial tool out there is knowledge. Over 60% (and we are among them) of credit unions offer free one-on-one counseling to anyone, member or not, because we know that it is not right for those who know the least to get taken advantage of the most.

Credit unions are a true community asset. Not a flashy one. Not a loud one. But a strong and stable one.


A credit union focuses on people, not profits. A credit union is not a building or a business. A credit union, when you boil it down, is a group of people, a cooperative, a community.


Wayne County is lucky to have several strong credit unions in our community. The Wayne County Community Federal Credit Union in Smithville is one of them. We might not be a household name (yet) but I assure you that in the households of our members, we are a source of strength, stability and pride.

Happy International Credit Union Day!

The list

As I drove around town last week, listening to NPR as usual, I stumbled onto an interview of Rosanne Cash. The interview was focused on a list that her famous father had given her when she was 18 years old. The list contained the 100 country songs that her father considered to be the most influential and crucial songs in country music and implored his daughter to get to know the songs intimately as they were the backbone of his musical heritage and hers. She admitted that at first she was unimpressed but gracious at the gesture. As the daughter of Johnny Cash she was swimming in a sea of country music and musicians and this seemed merely another drop in the ocean.



As she grew into her own musical identity she said that the list began to make more sense to her, along with the giving of the list, especially coming from her father. As she revisited the list several times over the following decades she realized that what her father shared with her was a part of his musical soul, his country DNA, a legacy that she shared with him both as a daughter and a musician herself. For years she resisted the urge to record any songs from the list in fear of being accused of “trading on her father’s name.”


In 2007 she revisited the list. Her father was now passed and she felt a need to feel the connection to him that the songs represented. In the years following she began to seek out and become intimate with the songs that made up the list and eventually began the work of recording a few of the songs herself. Not covers of the songs. Not her father’s renditions. She recorded the songs as her own and felt ownership of them, after all her father gave her the list, it was her property and recording the songs was her birthright. The CD was released yesterday, October 6th, 2009. Here’s what she said about it:


It is perhaps the only record I could have made at this point in my life, and it is deeply thrilling and very emotional for me to claim this legacy in this way, and, after a lifetime as a songwriter, to showcase some essential and truly great songs as a singer, an archivist, and as a daughter. And mother. This list now goes to my children.


I must admit, I am not a huge country music fan, though I am a fan of many of Johnny Cash’s classics. I’m not at all familiar with the music of Rosanne Cash. I simply find the story behind the list touching. As a parent it makes me think a lot about what “lists” I want to leave for my children. Would I leave them all the same lists? Would I cater the lists individually for each? What type of list would make up my musical DNA?


As I sit and think about it, the task seems like one that would have to be dealt with very circumspectly. I wouldn’t want to have it misinterpreted. I would want to have it represent who I am.  Would it be books?  Music?  Movies?  Places I've been? I have no idea...but I am going to start thinking about it.

If you were to make a list what would you include? Who would you give it too that could possibly decode it. Break it down. Use it as a means to know more about who you are and what’s inside your soul.

For some reason it makes me want to watch the movie High Fidelity. 

It seems there's a John Cusack movie for every occasion. 

Interesting stuff.

Waiting for the other shoe is a waste of time...

A week prior to our wedding in June of 1999 my wife Tanya and I were invited to go to camping with the maid of honor and her boyfriend near his home town of Inthemiddleofnowhereville. We were excited to get away from the wedding planning craziness and looking forward to the pending engagement of the couple as it was to take place that night around the campfire. We met up with some friends and loaded our gear in the back of the boyfriend's brother's pickup and headed off toward the campground only to veer off the side of the road, down a ravine and into a very stout tree going around 50 miles per hour. Tanya and I weren't wearing seatbelts, as the truck we were passengers in had none. We were thrown first into the windshield and then out of the passenger side door and onto the forest floor. Specifically into a huge patch of poison ivy, poison oak and thorns. Tanya had torn ligaments and cartilage in her knee and had broken her arm just above the elbow. I had a severe concussion and glass in my head.

The driver spilled his beer.

Tanya ended up in the emergency room of one hospital, I ended up getting a helicopter ride to another and once I woke up the next afternoon, we were 130 miles apart. We wouldn't see each other again until the rehearsal dinner. The wedding still went on and was beautiful. Tanya had a sling that matched her dress and I itched from head to toe thanks to the poison ivy. We were alive and we were married.

The honeymoon is when reality hit. Tanya was on serious pain meds to deal with the broken arm that still hadn't started to heal and the knee that still required surgery. (that would make for a wonderful first Christmas together as husband and wife) The Carnival Destiny as large as it was, still managed to roll with the motion of the ocean and that, along with the pain meds, made for a very irritated and nauseated bride. The constant itching and the nauseated, irritated wife made for a great time for me as a new husband. I spent hours on our balcony watching the water and wishing this was just a bad dream, realizing that I had just vowed to love Tanya in sickness and in health, but not really expecting the sickness part to start quite so soon. To put it bluntly, it sucked.

To be completely honest the first year of our marriage stunk. Tanya had several surgeries and months of rehab and I was stuck somewhere between home health aid and therapist as we tried to figure all of this out. I was angry, she was angry. Not the best of times.

BUT...we worked through it and learned to love each other at our weakest and worst.

The medical bills piled up and the "settlement" that we were promised by a crack attorney fizzled out to amount to around a third of what we owed. Another great lesson we had the privilege of learning right out of the gates. Finances are a hard thing to deal with as newlyweds, try adding $40,000 of medical debt to that lesson. It sucked.

BUT...we worked hard and paid it off after 6 long years and in the meantime learned to budget and live on less.

Less than 2 months after we were officially free of the debt from our car accident Tanya started having sharp pains in her side. She went in to the ER and they found several large stones in her gall bladder. No big deal, arthroscopic surgery is a piece of cake and she would be back on her feet chasing our 3 year old and 1 year old around the house in a couple of days. No such luck.

The surgeon who performed her operation sliced open her intestine and closed her up without repairing it. She spent a night in the hospital (where she was an RN) in excruciating pain and agony only to be told by the nurse that she was being too dramatic and that most people don't have this much pain, she must just not be strong enough to handle it. Right.

They discharged her, I brought her home and by that evening she was literally half dead. I drove her to the ER of another hospital only to find that she was in the process of going septic and her organs were starting to shut down. That night was the longest of my life as she groaned and shook in the ICU. They were to perform emergency surgery first thing in the morning to open her up and see what was going on. I thought again about loving my wife in sickness and in health.

The surgery was a success, but the recovery was hell. She was suffering from massive infections and an incision that spanned the length of her abdomen. We were on the critical care floor for a month. I say we because I rarely left her side for more than a few hours. I will never forget the way it felt to be trapped in the hospital. I would try to make the best of it, making the slow strolls down the hall carrying two IV poles as romantic as possible. Bringing movies in to watch together for "date night". It sucked.

BUT...we became a team during those long weeks. I surrendered myself and served her in whatever capacity she needed. She surrendered her pride and relied on me for even the most mundane of tasks. Our marriage not only survived, but thrived. My faith was strengthened as I began to feel God's hand in my life and in Tanya's healing. Our boys were at my parent's house and I tried to see them daily, they made frequent trips to the hospital to visit once Tanya was moved out of ICU and her vitals stabilized but it is a painful thing to see a mother separated from her children for 2 weeks and an even more painful thing to see a 1 and 3 year old try to process why Mommy is crying and why they can't hug her and why she doesn't come home to be with them. The recovery in the hospital was physical; the one at home over the next six months was emotional.

BUT...we learned that we can survive. That life is not fair or just. We were both off work for a total of 2+ months during this time.


Again, we found ourselves buried in a mountain of medical bills. This time we couldn't even find a lawyer who would take our case. Because Tanya lived through it we just didn't have a strong enough case. We were told, to our faces, that had she died they would have been happy to take the case. Thanks, you heartless wretches.

Anyway, Tanya recovered, she was able to deliver a beautiful baby boy last spring and all is well. Crazy with a house full of boys, but it is well. What we have found though, and the reason for my writing about this at all in this forum, is that it has created a habit in our way of thinking. A filter that all of the good things get pushed through. A feeling that at any moment, especially when things are going very well in our house, that the other shoe is going to drop. I have no idea where that phrase originated and frankly I don't care. I have realized over the past few months that living with that feeling of impending doom is a waste of time. A waste of energy. A waste of the gift of life that we have been given. It sucks.

There may very well be other tragedies that hit us. Life isn't fair or just. But to focus on that and not on the great times that daily brighten our lives defeats us before we ever step out onto the field. My kids will hopefully never remember the time that Tanya spent in the hospital or the tough months afterwards. At times I wish I could forget too. As I write out the checks to pay the bills now over 3 years old that are still hanging over us from that ordeal I find it hard to forget.

BUT...that doesn't mean we are doomed to repeat this cycle. Life happens...and right now I write the checks with a certain bit of pride in knowing that we have been through it before and we can do it again. We won. We were a team, and a damn good one at that. We will need every bit of that teamwork over the next 20 years to raise our boys into good, strong, Godly men. I am tired of waiting for the other shoe to drop. I think instead I'll look for opportunities to run around barefoot and crazy. With sand between my toes.

I will however be driving us to the beach myself...with my seatbelt on.