Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Bring it on...I'm a DAD

I was asked last week if I “could” organize a panel of small to mid-sized credit union CEO’s to sit in at a conference this fall and discuss how they are handling the current regulatory burden put upon us by the powers that be.  My answer; a simple “Yes, of course”.  I think this sort of open discussion is great.  I always walk away from the panels feeling like I have both gained insight and given some advice.  One of the few win-win opportunities left in this “me me me“ world.

This morning it hit me that the professional who asked me to organize this panel of peers asked me not if I was willing to do this, WOULD I…but if I was capable of doing it or COULD I.  Had I consciously considered his real question, my answer would have differed a bit, especially after this morning.

My lovely wife is an RN and as such she on occasion will work the odd hour shift.  This morning that happened to be a very early shift, up and out of the house before any of us were awake.  This left me to get up, shower and get myself ready for work, get my two school aged boys up and ready for school and get the baby up and dressed and ready to go off to spend the morning with Grandma.  Once dressed we all had to get breakfast, find shoes and jackets and then the backpacks for school.  Once that was all complete we had to get loaded in the minivan, making several trips back in to the house to grab a forgotten pair of shoes for the baby.  Then we had to go back in to get a forgotten bunch of silly bands.  Then I had to go back in and grab my coffee and Nalgene bottle of water…all while the rain poured down. 
 
All children were successfully delivered.  All children made it to their destinations with the appropriate accouterments and accessories.  All of them were on time.  No tears were shed.

So…to answer the question more specifically…CAN I get a panel of professional, educated adults in my field of expertise and made up of my peers together in one place and at the same time to discuss a mutually agreed upon topic for an hour…HELL YES I CAN, I’m a DAD!

Friday, September 17, 2010

When I married my wife I officially became a cat owner.

I didn’t mind Meka when we were dating and actually grew to love her once she was officially a member of my household. She was a playful and unique cat. Even at around 15 years old she looked like a kitten at times.
From the time I met Tanya, Meka has just always been part of the package. Most of the time a good part. Over the past 12 years she had put up with 7 moves, a rambunctious dog who thought she was half toy-half companion, 3 crazy kids and unfortunately, less and less attention from Tanya and I.
This morning, after a lot of discussion and tears, we had to say goodbye to her. It was her time.

Last night, after lying in bed for a few minutes it hit me that it was her last night with us. I went downstairs and found her sitting in the living room, staring at the wall. I brought her up and put her in bed with Tanya and I. She purred as Tanya sobbed and pet her. I pretended to be asleep.
When Meka sensed that Tanya was falling asleep she hopped off the bed and back down to the hardwood floor with a familiar thud.

I’m not sure why I felt the need to, but I grabbed a piece of paper off of my nightstand and crumpled it up. Paper balls have always been Meka’s favorite toy. When we pull out the couch to clean under it there are always a few small paper balls she has played with and then batted under, just out of her reach. I crumpled the paper up and she immediately was at my feet bouncing like a kitten. I threw the paper into the corner of the room and listened to the familiar sound of her talking to it and swatting at it. Usually I would get punched in the arm or at minimum chastised by Tanya for letting Meka have a ball before bed, knowing that the meowing would keep us awake for the next 4 hours as she played. This time, not a word. We both listened to Meka playing, talking to the ball, pouncing on it. I even got up at one point and threw it down the stairs for her, knowing the noise would continue as she played with the paper ball from step to step. Finally after an hour I picked the ball up and we got some sleep.
I will miss our cat. I am not a “cat person” and I can’t say that we will ever own another one. Maybe someday, but not soon. The boys want a dog, and we will get one at some point, but not for a while. I think the quiet house at night will be a good reminder of our friend Meka. It will be hard for Tanya for a little while. The boys will take a few days to notice. I’m pretty choked up when I think about it right now, but I know we did what was best for her.
The day will come when the last paper ball is found under a piece of furniture. It will be a month from now. Tears will be shed.
The worst part of being a pet owner is also the best part, you really grow to love the animals in your life, and the worst part of loving anyone is letting go.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Happy Campers



There is no better way to spend a brisk fall evening than sitting with friends and family around a crackling campfire.  There’s an intimacy and a certain magic to it.  The world outside of the fire’s orange glow seems to disappear. The smell of the smoke engages the part of an overworked brain that triggers an urge to tell embarrassing stories and laugh at people whom, in normal circumstances, are just not that funny.
I love this scenario.  I often paint the scene in my mind, sitting at my desk when office life gets too stressful.  I guess it’s my “happy place”.  I can’t pinpoint when the first time was that I experienced camping and the campfire, but whenever it was it made an impression on me.
I didn’t camp outdoors much as a kid.  Once in a blue moon my Dad would begrudgingly drag out the old canvas tent and set it up in the backyard for a birthday or summer weekend, most of the camping was of the “blanket over stacked couch cushions” kind.  I would imagine I was deep in the wilderness and able to survive with nothing but my keen survival skills and a small plastic bag of peanut butter crackers. 
I wasn’t a cub scout either.  I didn’t need to be.  I had seemingly endless woods to explore all around my house and parents who were brave enough to let me take Spike, the mutt and a backpack of full of army surplus out for hours at a time.  I learned to fish in the local farmer’s ponds.  I learned to hike on deer trails and learned to hunt with a Daisy single pump BB gun.  The only patches I earned were the ones sewn on the knees of my jeans or the old army ones I begged my Mom to sew everywhere else.
I was lucky enough to fall in with a cheerful band of outdoor pirates / mountain bikers in college and really fed my camping bug.  We often stayed out at the fire until the sun came up, the wood ran out or the bottles were all empty.  Being out in the woods was just what you did when classes were done for the week and the snow wasn’t flying.  The rest of the winter was spent anticipating the first trip of spring.  It was a great way to pick up chicks too.  Cool girls like dirt, that brings me to my next stage of camping.
My wife grew up camping with her family in a pop-up.  She has lots of memories of setting the camper up, playing around the campsite and of course time around the campfire with her family and church groups and friends.  When we started dating it was the dead of winter, so I had to wait until that spring to put her to the test.  That first camping trip with her was great, and really helped seal the deal.  She was beautiful, strong-willed AND loved the outdoors.  Definitely a keeper.  We spent most of our time off over the next few years camping either in Michigan, Northeast Ohio or around the Lake Erie Islands.  We even tried a spring trip to Colorado and found that camping in the mountains in March in Northern Colorado is not quite the experience we expected. 
Once our kids came along we continued to camp fairly often, but it did mean we had to make some changes.  First we invested in a bigger tent, then better equipment, then cots.  It started to feel like we were gypsies moving a caravan from town to town and less like we were escaping the stress of stuff to get out into nature.  We were just bogged down with baby baggage.  Suddenly now instead of a tent and sleeping bags with a few key tools we had to pack cots and cribs and toys and a heater and a fan and diapers and clothes and an extra cooler of the juice and the milk and the baby food.  We used to be able to pack everything in the trunk of my small convertible and head out for a week, now we were completely loading an SUV, including a car-top carrier for an overnight stay.  It was nuts.
The last few years we camped a total of 3 times.  It was sad.
Then we realized that perhaps it was time to consider that we didn’t have to “rough it” to get back out in the woods.  We started noticing pop-up campers.  We started getting online and researching pop-up campers.  Finally last spring we went out and bought our pop-up camper.
Our pop-up, set up for the first time at "Camp Grandpa"
It has all of the necessities that make camping with kids possible, without the luxuries that make you feel guilty about it.  There are comfortable beds, there is no bathroom.  There is storage for all of the stuff, but there is no furnace.  It has a small gas stove, but no air conditioning.  It is the perfect compromise.  Even with the unbearably hot summer we had this year and the ever increasing demands at work, we still managed to get out and camp 5 times so far, and fall has just begun.  I am excited again about getting out and camping.  I love that when I grab my hat and put it on it smells like a campfire again.  Granted, the bottles are full of baby formula now and not tequila and I usually get woken up at the crack of dawn by my little men instead of sleeping in, it’s still camping, and I am loving every minute of it!